How are you doing mama? Are you managing and coping okay? There is so much going on in the world and in your life. I wonder if you wish you had the coping skills to deal with it all. Maybe you feel like the joy has been sucked out of your family or you just aren’t experiencing motherhood or parenting the way you wish you were.
You are not alone. I can very much relate to those feelings. I am right there in the trenches with you and I know where you are coming from. In fact I bet you have a friend or relative who is feeling the same way. I encourage you to share this post and podcast episode with them. Today I’ll share a few things that helped me go from overwhelmed and frustrated to confidence and peace!
First is mindset because what you believe about yourself and your situation is more likely to come true. Your thoughts dictate your feelings and those lead to actions and results.
I start with mindset first because parenting is all about the parent! Most families I work with come to me because of challenges they face with their children. I share strategies and tips that work, but without working on yourself first those are just going to be another tool that you tried and didn’t work.
Take a moment and think about these questions: What are your thoughts about yourself as a mom, woman, and partner? Who are you? The real you?
Write down your beliefs – they may come from childhood, relationships, experiences along the way. Find scripture to counteract those limiting beliefs. Let’s rewrite the story, the lies you have been telling yourself.
Corinthians 5:10 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
You see when you believe in yourself and in the amazing God who can carry you through anything, you will bring that energy into your day. You hold the space.
- I am not smart – If you ask for wisdom God give it freely (James 1:5)
- I am a mean mom – God did not give us a spirit of timidity but one of power love and self control (2 Timothy 1:7)
- I can’t change or I can’t do this – I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13)
More tips for Mindset
- Do a daily affirmation
- Write down verses and quotes your bathroom mirror (go ahead and take your kid’s window markers!)
- Daily devotionals
- Pray and ask God to reveal to you those limiting beliefs and guide you to His word that will overcome.
- Gratitude journal
It is not selfish to care for yourself. It is essential. You hold the space for your family. If you are not at your best, or working on that, it shows.
How often do you worry about the amount of veggies your kids are getting? How many about obsessing over your kids’ sleep habits? I bet your kids are being cared for in the most amazing ways, and yet as moms we can get through the whole morning and realize we haven’t even gone to the bathroom yet! Am I right?
I get that you are busy and don’t have time. But there are some very real practical things you can do to help care for yourself. YOU need to realize your value and put yourself as a priority too! Take time to focus on your sleep, food and exercise. Do these things with your kids to get the whole family involved.
More tips for self care
- Set a timer to check in
- Drink more water
- Focus on breathing
- Do one thing every day for yourself that you enjoy!
- You are not just a mom, when you take time to rediscover yourself you inspire your children too. They are watching. You are modeling (good and bad)
- Go for a walk
- Get outside
- Accomplish something (do a task, yard work, check off a list)
- Listen to music
These are strategies and techniques to help you manage. Some are self care of course. There are different types of coping skills such as calming, physical, distracting, and processing. Try many out to figure what works best for you. Do them as a family as that will benefit your children too. Make a poster if that helps as a visual reminder.
You are not alone. I know I’ve said that before but do you believe it? It can be very humbling and awkward to accept help but when we do we open up the doors for God to work in both lives.
- Let people whom you trust, know you are struggling
- Keep searching for like minded families
- Find a listening ear
- Get help and accountability
I’d love to be that listening ear, accountability partner or coach. Be sure to contact me to chat.
It may take time but, progress is better than none or getting worse. It is not wasted time but it is an investment in the future, in your family, and in your self. If you want me to check in on you send me a message or let me know in the comments. I believe in you.
If you found today’s message helpful PLEASE share it with others, invite your friends to join the community, leave a rating and review, connect with me.
Here are some links I mentioned (let me know if I forgot any)
Gentle / Peaceful Parenting Community on Facebook